ugh! i don't even know wut to write, it's so weird, i mean i dunno, stuff happens, but its different now, i used to write down everything, and want everyone to read it, and i didn't mind if anyone on the face of the earth read it, cuz no matter how personal it was, it was still something i didn't mind sharing. now, it's not that anything special is happening, it's not as if a bunch of things r going on that i don't want people to know about, it just seems that lately the things that have happened, i don't want to put into writting, becuz then i will see them logically and for now, i'd just like to think about them. somehow wen things happen in my head they're different than when i write them down on paper or type them on a screen, and sometimes i'd rather think about them, cuz they make sense in my head but wen i write them down, it doesn't seem like a big deal anymore, it seems insignificant all of a sudden, and i don't like that, sometimes i want to enjoy things before i exploit them, becuz sometimes it's not public knowledge yet and i dont wanna get caught saying something, if it doesn't go down. so i guess im writting to say that i'm not going to write....get that? lol i dunno, goodnite all, changedfish

"The Right Thing" u no, i don't think in every situation there is a "right thing" to do, maybe in some, but not in all! i mean sometimes ur between wut's right and wut makes u happy, or ur in between wut's bad and wut's worse, sometimes ur in between something great and something great and u just have to choose which great u want, and that's not easy! some people handle the situation by just not choosing at all, they just don't make either decision, hoping to keep all the best of all the worlds to themselves...most of the time it blows up in they're faces, but sometimes they get lucky and win it all....other people choose too quickly, they don't give themselves a chance to think and often end up picking the wrong thing and screwing themselves over! but wut annoys me is wen people know the obvious choice and they don't take it, or wen they choose the obviously wrong one!

what happens wen u hit the standstill? strange idea i've found, i mean what comes next wen u've reached the point of comfort and ur still not comfortable? it's strange wen u know what u want, and u know ur options and yet it seems the decision still can't be made. it's like what u want and what u do are so different they rn't even in the same catagory. and then there's the topic of other people and what they want and what they need, u should think of others first, always, right? that's the way it seems but sometimes i wonder if those others think of others first, meaning do they think of me? i'm not sure, and somethings are things you can't talk about, somethings u wish u didn't have to say, that they'd just sort of be heard, be communicated thro wut's not said, but it doesn't happen that way, and sometimes u just have to accept that, be ok w/that and not worry about it, becuz it's ur own durn fault that u didn't say anything in the first place, i mean isn't that just blatent miscommunication? that's like purposful miscommunication and it's just mean to expect people to understand wut ur not even saying....but somehow u expect them to know, expect them to hear ur thots, ur wants, ur needs....sometimes i think things always turn out for the best anyhow, so y try and fix them urself....anyhow, i'z just thinking, changedfish

The Power of Touch
u no, touch is a very powerful thing, it has the power to comfort, the power to express love, it has the powere to inflict pain, and to create fear, it has the power to weaken and the power to strengthen, it can be tender, it can be harsh. touch can be a blessing, it can be a curse, it can blow ur world to pieces, it can open new doors, it can express freedom, or it can imprison u in the dark. different types of touch create different reactions, hugs vs. hits i guess.......i'z just thinking i guess, changedfish

one of a kind
u no that saying "ur one of a kind"? ya, uh, i never quite understood that. i mean it's like supposed to mean that ur all special and there's no one else like u, but in reality ur saying ur one of a kind, like there is a whole kind like u, and ur just one of them. i mean how backward is that, the saying definitely contradicts itself! or maybe that's just my interpretation, but still, i think it's strange...........Inquiry of the day: since when is awkwardness desirable???? ya, that's exactly my point!!!
changedfish