The Metaphorical Release
I hate drama-no, not the class- life's drama. and i hate it more when people have a right to be dramatic and ya no what the climax is? when it's ME that GIVES them that reason.
sometimes when you're doing something you can't see the bigger picture sometimes you don't realize the effects of your actions until they're complete.
I usually feel like i can pretty much see what's comming based on what i do and generally try to stear clear of life's potholes. but i guess this time i was too busy staring at my own friggin reflection in the mirror to see the huge tree in my path. and it's not that i've hit it, no, no one's been hurt yet, but i've just discovered that i'm heading straight into it and if i don't put on the brakes and swerve (who knows the spelling of that?) away i'm going to have a major problem.
How was i to know the world was involved in my endeavors? they've never noticed or cared before! and now they're all watching w/telescopes? i could say it was as much the tree's fault as mine, but that sounds silly now doesn't it? so the only person to blame is me!
i won't let him do to her, what she did to him! it may be what she's got comming, the whole taste-of-her-own-medicine bit, but that's not for me to decide and bitterness isn't right. and maybe i'm just flattered by the attention he showed and maybe i was trying to create a problem for his problem, w/o knowing it. maybe i truly AM one of those type of girls i've never liked. maybe i do the exact things i loath. maybe it's wishfull thinking, maybe a strong hope, or perhaps a mere underestimating of blatent facts. whatever it was, it was my fault.
and now it's a big deal? i can do one thing over here and it's ok, unnoticed by all, and then do the exact same thing over there a moment later and it's a riot. i don't get how i put myself in these situations!
i once heard someone say that if you're trying to miss a pothole and you stare at it (to know where it is) you're going to run right over top of it. and if u look where u want to go , instead of focusing on the spot to miss, you'll be fine. so i guess trying to avoid problems creates problems. who knew? not me, that's for sure. i just realized that i've never really had problems that effected anyone else (but me) usually it's my mistake, my screw up, my problem. but somehow this time i stepped to far out of the box and now i'm landing on others toes.
so i'm sorry, lo siento, i didn't look where i was headed, i didn't check to see if my passengers wanted to take that route, i just plunged ahead. and now comes the tuff part of changing directions. it's not as easy to return as if you've never left. it's not as fun to leave the place you want to be to go where others want you to go. but at times it's the best to listen to others. sometimes they can see the spots you missed. sometimes, life's just DRAMA!
and it doesn't mean that u can't return there later, it doesn't mean that you have to leave that place and run the oppisite way forever, it just means take a step back, look at the greater picture, it means taking others advice, reading the situation and doing what you know is best
changedfish-the driver