it's not about forgiveness, it's not about time, it's not about the experiences, it's about other people. i frustrate myself sometimes. you know, i've realized something, that if u tell a story and ur all happy about it, others r happy about it, and if u tell a story and ur upset, others are upset, and if u tell a story as if it's bad, others think it's bad. sometimes i tell people things catering to the way i want them to react, most of the time because of my selfish nature and it worx out better for me....problem is, once i get them thinking one way, it's hard to :beep:beep:beep: reverse it up and think differently, and when i change my mind it's easy and i do it often but to change others is not so easy. it's hard to tell people one thing one way and then change it around and tell them pretty much the same thing, another way....i tell you all things about people, and sometimes i'm right on, and sometimes i'm not, if u take all i say to heart and truly believe it as fact, then i'm sorry, i don't want everyone to think i'll never change my mind, that i won't take back what i've said, i don't mind eating my words, so to speak, as long as it's for good reason, and i don't know if this is a good reason yet, i don't know if the facts have changed, i have to figure it out for myself, and until i do, you'll all just have to be confused, bottom line is i don't tell y'all everything, i'm allowed to pick and choose what i say, and what i don't and somethings i say i shouldn't have and vice versa, but i guess, i'm strong enuf, confident enuf, now to figure things out on my own and w/God's help, and i think that sometimes that's better. aw geez, changedfish