At the end of the nite, i'm always still me
i'm not sure if this is a good or bad thing. it seems to be a good thing rite? most people think u shouldn't change yourself for others, that u should hold true to the way u r. and i have no problem w/that, i believe that...but what if i want to change, wut if i hate being predictable all the time. i mean, what if i never change, what if i'm like this forever? i no that sounds all dramatic, cuz everything always changes, but sometimes i just wonder is all, if i'll ever get over or grow out of this awkward stage in my life. i mean i'll be 16 in like 5 months, and if i'm going to be different i should start now, rite? somepeople change themselves to fit in, or to be like other people, to get something. but me, i want to change for me, i mean, ya i'm always changing, but it seems that at the end of the nite, i'll always still be just plain ol' me. it's annoying, and it seems that wenever i do something unpredictable that i'm all proud of, or that i had fun with, that i get all this crap about it, it's just frustrating that i feel that i'm stuck w/this life i'm living, stuck in this body, stuck w/these friends, stuck w/this family, just plain stuck, and i don't want to be stuck! i want to be free, to make my own decisions, to do what i want (w/in reason) i want to make new friends but still keep the old, and i don't wanna feel bad for doing wut i no is rite, i don't, i don't, i just don't!!! it seems every entry i write is just this angry venting, but this is where i get all my feelings, all my emotions, all my thots out, where i can just say whatever i want and there's no one that can stop me, u can comment u can make fun, but u can't stop me!! hey if u wanna write me something feel free. email me at rubbadubdub16@hotmail.com and i'll read wutever u have to say, heck i'll even email u back! wutev, i'm having a strange nite lay off! changedfish