wow, ur prolly wondering why it's been so long since i've written...well truthfully it's cuz i didn't know what to write, i didn't know if i should go into detail or if i should keep it mysterious, if i should tell everyone what the heck i was talking about or if i should just keep it simple and i decided that i'd just come out w/it and tell you all everything about everything (ok, maybe not THAT much, but ya)
the "firsts" i was talking about was dating, ok, so i'd never been on a date, im not the only one, i know plenty of people (mostly girls, but still) that have never been on a date, some that never had a b/f or g/f etc. etc. but i now have, i went on a date w/my friend Will. alright so u think, if it's a date y'd she call him her friend will, and not "this guy" or my b/f or something, truthfully we're not dating, prolly never will, he just called my out of the blue last friday and asked me to go w/him to the movies on saturday...it was weird, but i was hecka excited and very flattered as well, i mean he chose me, out of anyone he coulda called, he called me...awesome rite?
it was a great date!!! he picked me up at my house (he already knows my whole family from forever ago, so that was a breeze) and we headed off, we saw Paycheck, which i would definately recomend! it was a good movie cuz it wasn't to much a girl or a guy movie, it was just both, and it wasn't too romantic so that was good, cuz i didn't want him getting any bright ideas, rite? anyhow, it kinda sucked cuz after that i had to go home, cuz we were having the neighbors over for dinner, which normally i could have missed, however they r new neighbors and they have a girl my age and anyhow i had to go, so that was sort of it...he took me home, came in, we hugged (my rents we in the kitchen so nothing else really coulda gone down there) and he left....hasn't called, i of course am not going to call him (cuz i just think if he wants to he will) and ya...so its like over...and even tho it was a really good date and all i really don't know how many more i want to go on, i mean i REALLY don't want to lead him on, cuz i hate wen girls do that, just cuz they want a date! its not that i don't like him, or never have liked him or anything, it was just sort of everytime i thot about him romantically (don't think like that, i mean like dating him, or kissing him) i just was very aware that it was Will, and i just don't think i could! i mean if i didn't know him so well, and know how weird he is and how much i know i really prolly wouldn't enjoy a real relationship with him, then it'a been aight, but i dunno, it just isn't gonna happen, so i have NO idea wut to do now! i mean i can't break things off if nothing ever happens, but i'm afraid he's gonna call again and ask me to go out again and i dunno what to say, cuz i don't really want to say no w/o having a reason, or like shut him down w/o giving him a chance, sooooo....i dunno whats going down, all i can say is i have now officially been on a date, a real one (he paid and everything lol) so ya...things r good besides that too!! love u all soooo much, God loves you sooo much more than any of us can ever even think about or fathom in our wildest of dreams, so keep that in mind, changedfish