wow, my internet has been down for a few days, and it just got back up now, i'm psyched, cuz i've been thinking about wut to write for like ever, and now i finally can.
the aftermath
ok, so i said a lotta stuff, a lotta stuff that didn't make sense, a lotta stuff that was thinking but a lotta stuff i prolly shouldn't have said...but i'm not taking it back! i'm serious! i'm not....that's exactly wut i was feeling that nite, both entries! and it's just...i dunno! to him:ur confused, and u should be....but u shouldn't be mad. i understand that ur upset, i gave u no warning, i gave little explaination, and that's frustrating, but all i want u to know is that i didn't WANT to hurt u, and i no i did, i didn't want a lot of this to happen, but it did, i do care about u, i honestly do, more than i've ever cared about any guy before EVER! and no matter how much i truly care, i KNOW that wut i'm doing is right, i just don't think i should be with u, i just don't, it may be hard to hear, hard to accept, hard to understand, i just can't, it's not that ur not perfect for me, becuz u r, and it's not that we wouldn't be great together, i think we would, and it's not that we couldn't be happy, i think we could, its just....i can't, it's not wut God wants for me, and i'm hoping u can take that....i AM sorry that u've been hurt, i know u have been hurt before and this can't help things, and i didn't mean to hurt u, but i knew i would....i'm not sure wut u'd like me to do now....i can't explain my feelings to u, i've tried but it doesn't work, i don't know anything, we've been over this before, my practical intelligence level-LOW! anyhow, changedfish