He claims he's the victim- stranded by the nine to five.
school's almost over!! i pretty much can't believe it! i mean by this time next week i'll have no more compulsory education left and that's craziness! but also wonderful..because it means that all this work is paying off.
it's crazy to think how many things are going to change, not just with me, with everyone...this is that time in your life where everythign begins to transition. i mean up until now things have been different but not to such an extreme, there were general factors that were the same, i mean for me i've always lived in the same area with the same people around. same school district and church area and grocery stores and mall and it's just crazy to think those things won't be there anymore. i don't know what i'm going to do without my own room in my own house and my own bed and all these comfort items that i never thought i would be without....i better bring a lot of socks to college.
ah and i know i'm just wigging out because it's getting closer, but i feel like i'm going to be gone at camp a lot of the summer and then i'm leaving to go to college across the country and it's just like AH wait, what if i'm making a mistake, what if i'm not ready to go away, what if i'm not mature enough to make it on my own, what if i won't be ok, what if things don't work out? and i know those are just what if's but at the same time now is the time that i should be evaluating my what if senarios, before i leave!
ugh, on a slightly less pyschotic note, prom is saturday, and i'm excited to look pretty haha...i know it's superficial but who doesn't like to look especially good and be surrounded with other people who look especially good. i'm excited...about most of it anyhow, but i'll opt out of getting into that right now- o and now i hear it might rain, what's with that, it's over 100 for like a week and now the one night we want clear skies it may rain? geez, so much for the outdoor swing band- it's last year all over again- but better of course, sorta. oh yea, and i totally am just ordering my boutinere (however you spell that stupid thing) today, and so they're like, it will be ready saturday after 4 (which is ok cuz i won't need it before then, but hopefully my mom or dad will pick it up haha) i'm glad i'm so on top of things!
actually these last two or three weeks ahve been so disorganized and blah, it's like i'm getting htings done but BARELY...i guess i just caught the senioritis but i need to watch it because i only have one school day and then finals and if i can just make it through that then i'm home free and if i don't then...i'm screwed royally!
i don't, know i'm so apathetic when it comes to everything lately...i just don't care...i frankly could care less about a lot of things that i used to think were vital, and a lot of them still are vital i guess but i've just given up on caring...is that so bad? is it so bad to let a few things slip off your priority list? I mean i realize how it SOUNDS, that it makes it sound horrible or like i'm giving up on life as a whole, i mean it makes me seem like some dud, but really i've found i worry about too many things, i care about too much, too many people, and at some point i snap and say that's it, that's enough, i quit...wouldn't it be better if before i quit i just kind of checked a few off the list...prolonged the surge of stress and just eased out of a few upsetting factors? i think it's a wise idea personally, i think it makes perfect sense....but you feel free to judge as you may
changedfish- being apathetic's a pathetic way to be, but i don't care
school's almost over!! i pretty much can't believe it! i mean by this time next week i'll have no more compulsory education left and that's craziness! but also wonderful..because it means that all this work is paying off.
it's crazy to think how many things are going to change, not just with me, with everyone...this is that time in your life where everythign begins to transition. i mean up until now things have been different but not to such an extreme, there were general factors that were the same, i mean for me i've always lived in the same area with the same people around. same school district and church area and grocery stores and mall and it's just crazy to think those things won't be there anymore. i don't know what i'm going to do without my own room in my own house and my own bed and all these comfort items that i never thought i would be without....i better bring a lot of socks to college.
ah and i know i'm just wigging out because it's getting closer, but i feel like i'm going to be gone at camp a lot of the summer and then i'm leaving to go to college across the country and it's just like AH wait, what if i'm making a mistake, what if i'm not ready to go away, what if i'm not mature enough to make it on my own, what if i won't be ok, what if things don't work out? and i know those are just what if's but at the same time now is the time that i should be evaluating my what if senarios, before i leave!
ugh, on a slightly less pyschotic note, prom is saturday, and i'm excited to look pretty haha...i know it's superficial but who doesn't like to look especially good and be surrounded with other people who look especially good. i'm excited...about most of it anyhow, but i'll opt out of getting into that right now- o and now i hear it might rain, what's with that, it's over 100 for like a week and now the one night we want clear skies it may rain? geez, so much for the outdoor swing band- it's last year all over again- but better of course, sorta. oh yea, and i totally am just ordering my boutinere (however you spell that stupid thing) today, and so they're like, it will be ready saturday after 4 (which is ok cuz i won't need it before then, but hopefully my mom or dad will pick it up haha) i'm glad i'm so on top of things!
actually these last two or three weeks ahve been so disorganized and blah, it's like i'm getting htings done but BARELY...i guess i just caught the senioritis but i need to watch it because i only have one school day and then finals and if i can just make it through that then i'm home free and if i don't then...i'm screwed royally!
i don't, know i'm so apathetic when it comes to everything lately...i just don't care...i frankly could care less about a lot of things that i used to think were vital, and a lot of them still are vital i guess but i've just given up on caring...is that so bad? is it so bad to let a few things slip off your priority list? I mean i realize how it SOUNDS, that it makes it sound horrible or like i'm giving up on life as a whole, i mean it makes me seem like some dud, but really i've found i worry about too many things, i care about too much, too many people, and at some point i snap and say that's it, that's enough, i quit...wouldn't it be better if before i quit i just kind of checked a few off the list...prolonged the surge of stress and just eased out of a few upsetting factors? i think it's a wise idea personally, i think it makes perfect sense....but you feel free to judge as you may
changedfish- being apathetic's a pathetic way to be, but i don't care
posted by changedfish @ 9:20 PM
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